Let’s talk about Seinfeld emails.
Weird name for an email, right?
If you’re thinking about the TV show Seinfeld, you’re on the right track.
The show was famously “about nothing.” It was just random, everyday stuff. And yet, people loved it.
Now, imagine writing emails like that.
You don’t have to be super clever or always pitch your product.
You can talk about…well, anything!
As long as you keep it interesting, people will keep reading.
And when people read, they trust you.
And when they trust you, they buy from you.
Let’s dig into how to make these “Seinfeld Emails” work.
What the Heck Is a Seinfeld Email?
A Seinfeld email is an email about nothing.
It’s an email that tells a random story, observation, or thought.
It grabs the reader’s attention, makes them chuckle, or just makes them go, “Huh, that’s interesting.”
And then—boom—you slip in the sales pitch.
The story doesn’t have to connect perfectly to the product. It just needs to be entertaining enough for people to keep reading until you bring up the thing you’re selling.
Example 1: The Grocery Store Meltdown
Imagine you’re writing an email. You start like this:
Subject: How a flying tomato made me think of You
Hey there,
So there I was, in the grocery store, minding my own business.
Then, out of nowhere, a wild tomato goes flying and smashes against the shelves. Total chaos. Sauce on the floor, mom in panic mode, kid probably plotting his next move.
It got me thinking…
Managing an email list can be a lot like that – unpredictable and messy. You aim for smooth sailing, but sometimes, you get flying tomatoes instead.
Lucky for you, I’m no stranger to cleaning up messes – digital ones, that is. I’ve already helped over 50 businesses turn their email chaos into orderly profits.
Curious?
>>> Click here to discover the strategy that’s making email marketing cleanup a breeze
Catch you soon,
Daniel “Cleanup Crew” Matievich
See what happened there?
First, you get pulled in with the story about the grocery store. It’s relatable. It’s a little funny. And suddenly, we’re talking about email lists.
It doesn’t matter that the story has nothing to do with email marketing. What matters is that it got you hooked.
Example 2: The Socks That Always Disappear
Let’s do another:
Subject: Where the heck do socks go in the dryer?
Seriously, I want to know.
I put two socks in. But only one ever comes out.
Is there some secret sock-eating monster in my dryer?
Oddly enough, this is kinda like those leads that pop onto your list and then — poof — gone. Not fun.
But don’t worry, no monsters here.
I’ve got a no-slip method to keep ’em sticking around like that one sock that clings to your shirt.
Want in?
>>> Just click here, and I’ll spill the beans
And keep ’em sticking like static.
Yup, making leads stick can be as simple as solving the sock mystery. No magic, just good old marketing smarts.
Catch you soon,
Daniel “Still got both my socks” MatievichP.S. No socks were harmed in the making of this email.
Again, totally random story about socks. But it gets to the point.
It talks about the common problem of losing leads. And that little analogy makes the reader think, “Hey, that makes sense.”
And guess what? If you were curious about my sock mystery, you’re probably curious about my solution for keeping leads, too.
Example 3: My Terrible Haircut
One more, just for fun:
Subject: That time I rocked a pineapple haircut
Hey there,
Guess what happened when I tried a new barber? Spoiler: It wasn’t pretty.
You know SpongeBob?
Yeah, imagine his pineapple house… but as a haircut on my head.
Ridiculous, right?
Here’s the kicker—it got me thinking. Trying new stuff, like chopping all your hair off or nailing email copy, is playing with fire.
Sometimes you end up a trendsetter. Other times? You’re just a walking, talking fruit salad.
So why gamble? Especially with your emails, which—let’s face it—are your moneymakers.
Instead of turning your email list into a style disaster (like my pineapple ‘do)…
Why not let a pro handle it? Yep, I’m looking at you.
>>> Click this and avoid the “pineapple effect” with your emails
Catch you on the stylish side,
Daniel “never trusting new barbers again” Matievich
See how this works?
It’s about turning a mundane story into a message that makes you want to click the link.
I’m making you laugh, or at least smile, and then sliding my offer into your inbox without feeling pushy.
Why Do Seinfeld Emails Work So Well?
Because people are sick of boring, salesy emails.
They see them every day.
But when you give them a story that’s funny, or weird, or just interesting, they remember it.
And when they remember you, they’re more likely to buy from you.
Seinfeld emails are like a Trojan Horse.
You sneak in the story, and inside is your pitch. And by the time the reader figures it out, they’re already interested in what you have to say.
How to Write Your Own Seinfeld Emails
- Think of a Random Story: It could be about your dog, your morning coffee, or that time you accidentally sent a text to the wrong person.
- Relate It to Your Offer: Find a way to connect your story to the problem your reader has. It doesn’t have to be perfect, just close enough.
- Keep It Fun: Use short sentences. Make jokes. Write like you’re talking to a friend.
- Drop the Link: Somewhere in there, mention how you can help or what you’re offering. And add a link.
And That’s It!
That’s how you do it. Seinfeld emails keep things light, easy, and fun.
So next time you sit down to write an email, tell a story. Be a little weird. And watch how your readers start paying attention.
Here’s to nothing—cheers!
Daniel Matievich
P.S. Writing these “Seinfeld emails” sounds fun, right? But if you’d rather leave the storytelling to someone else while you focus on your business, I’ve got you. I’ll turn your everyday stories into emails that people actually want to read. You know where to find me. 😉